Wildest Dreams

Hey there my friend. I canít help but notice you seem to be sniffing around. Looking for something to buy, am I right? Yes, I can see I am. And something a little... hmm... discreet, yes? Ah, yes, yes. Thatís got you interested. Well, then, youíve come to the right place. Out here in the Syndicate, we can get you anything you want, no questions asked. I see Iíve pegged you right. Come right this way, right this way.

My name? Well, thatís not important. And neither is yours, to be honest. As long as youíve got the ISK and Iíve got what youíre looking for, thatís all we really need to know about each other, right? Good, Iím glad we understand each other. I suggest you donít ask anyone else here their name. If they want you to know it, theyíll tell you. Start asking, theyíll think youíre a DEDer and theyíll make you deader! Ha-hah!

Bleu, Katt, Nina! Get out here!

Girls, say hello to our newest customer. Mmm, you like what you see, do you? Let me tell you something, my good man, they donít make them anywhere like they make them in the Syndicate. Everyone thinks genetic engineering is just for the Jove, but you donít get an all-natural pair like herís just because daddy and mommy had good genes, no sir.

Donít be afraid to touch, they donít mind. Thatís what they live for!

Ah, but I can see youíre a man of refined tastes. Old fashioned genetically engineered girls arenít for you. Come right this way, let me show you something...

Viola! Check her out! What? Oh, donít tell me you donít recognize Alakoni Ishanoya, CEO of Lai Dai! Well, I guess youíre right, you donít ever get to see her wearing something like that, no. Itís not really her, of course, but it sure as hell looks like her, doesnít it? A little plastic surgery here, a bit of genetic modification there... Let me tell you, sheíd pass ten of the twenty-nine tests CONCORD uses to establish identity.

Of course, sheís not the only one weíve got. Aha! I see you recognize, her, hmm? Well, let me tell you what, youíll never see the real her doing that. At least, not where anyone else could see her. Itíd take her straight out of the running for the Emperor, I bet. Oh, watch this.

Yes, Karin Midular. Any Amarrian who saw this right now would probably explode, seeing their very own Heiress getting that done to her by the head of the Republic. Iíve got more if you want to check them out.

No? Not even the original Quafe Girl herself, Poire Viladillet? Well, I guess youíre right. They are just physical replicas. Trained actresses, all of them. But not the real person.

No, no! Donít leave yet. I can show you more, if youíre interested. And I can tell you are. Let me guess, you like a powerful woman, right? And not just powerful in that she could buy and sell you and thereís nothing you can do about it. But powerful enough to make a battleship point at your head and blow it off.

Yes, I mean a pod pilot. And guess what? These are as close to the real thing as you can get. Now, I canít promise you any old pod pilot. Weíve only got the popular models here. Although, for the right price, we can get whoever you like. Got a little crush on some sweet Ni-Kunni pod pilot priestess, we can get her for you. Weíve done it before.

Hmm, not that picky? Well, let me show you what we do have.

You donít recognize her? Why, sheís the vixen of the pod pilots, the woman every man wishes he could have! Sheís starred on holoreels, sheís starred in your nightly fantasies, now she can be there live and in person. Aha! I knew youíd get it eventually.

Well, thatís a good question. You know, pod pilots have a habit of leaving their DNA scattered all over the place. No, I donít mean it like that, though I like the way you think. Biomass, my good friend! Most people just think biomass gets recycled, used up again for new clones. Well, we donít like to let such valuable skin go to waste. It just takes a little bit of DNA to make a near-perfect clone.

Personality? You sure are a weird one, not many people come around here looking for ďpersonality.Ē Well, it ainít perfect... Cause if it were perfect, she sure as hell wouldnít be interested in you, thatís for damn sure. But with a little high tech scanning, we can get most of what we need from the biomass. Like I said, it ainít perfect. Depending on how long that biomass has been sitting out there, sometimes, theyíre a bit more crazy than they are in reality.

What else do we got? Well, check out this one. Oh, I see you recognize her. Guess you follow that InterGal place. Of course, when most people say ďscrew herĒ they donít mean what weíre meaning. But you know what I said earlier about crazy? Oh yeah. Way more. But trust me, from what all my clients have said, itís the wildest, best night of their lives.

Oh, yeah, way more popular. Hey, thereís something sexy about getting down and dirty with some one who has a philosophy and isnít afraid to kick your ass about it. Just donít let her know about it, else everyone will know about how many times your helpless ass has been killed.

Not interested much in the Gallente, I see. I should have guessed. Itís always that way with your kind. Oh, no, I didnít mean it like that. I meant thereís a certain charm about the Caldari ladies that canít be matched.

Check out this one. Oh, you seem very interested, my friend. They call her, and her corp, a pet. But tonight, my friend, you can really make her your pet. Youíll show her what it means to be Caldari, am I right?


Iím glad I could find just what you wanted, my friend. But itís not cheap, oh no. Thereís a bit of risk, you see. Iím afraid if any of them found out, well, little old me wouldnít be long for this world. And I doubt any of my friends, family, close acquaintances, pets, distant acquaintances, or former clients would be either.

Ah, so youíre one of them too, huh? Well, trust me, weíre not going to go scouring for your biomass any time soon. No offense, of course. But Iíll tell you what, if you happen to come across any... particularly interesting biomass out there, let me know. We can work out some deal, one for one.

But about this deal... Tell me, whatís too steep for your wildest dreams?

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